


Alex's Own X-File

by carolelained



Category: X-Files - Fandom, slash fiction - Fandom
Genre: Adult Situations, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-15 13:01:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5786173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolelained/pseuds/carolelained
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex has a hard time with Fox to get the life he want's</p>
            </blockquote>





	Alex's Own X-File

Alex's Own X File

By CarolelaineD

Alex sat there in his motel room wondering what had become of him, no home no family, shit no nothing, he was alone. He grabbed the bottle of vodka and took a large swig, fuck he was already pissed so he might as well finish it now.

He couldn’t explain how he felt as he was so mixed up, he sat crying for the life he had lost and would never have again, fuck the depression was taking a strong hold on him.

Over an hour later he was still depressed and realised the vodka was not helping, his chest ached and he hurt so much. However he felt angry at the same time, Alex had only ever loved one man, a man who despised him and had a good reason for doing so.

He knew Fox would never understand that he had sacrificed his own life for the human race, he had lost so many years to the cause and wondered if it was worth carrying on.

Deep down Alex knew he only stayed alive for Fox, but what was the point as he started sobbing and couldn’t live like this anymore. Little did he know the depression was getting worse and having Fox Mulder was to become his one and only goal in life?

He drove drunk not really caring anymore, he located the old building and set about making it cleaner, he then brought a bed from upstairs and retrieved the blankets from his car. He checked and cleaned the downstairs bathroom, he planned to use as little of the house as possible.

  
When Alex had decided he could do no more, he drove home and fell into a deep sleep.

Alex had it all planned and he knew the route Fox would take while out running, also he knew with the rain that not many people would be around, all he would have to do was wait. Alex saw Fox come along the path as usual and he had wanted this man for so long, well now the time had come, Fox Mulder would be his one way or another.

He waited behind some bushes taking Fox by surprise, he knocked him to the ground, too hard knocking the man out. Alex had not planned for him to hit his head, what the hell Fox's breathing seemed okay.

Alex took this as a sign to get the hell out of there, he dragged Fox into the car and drove away. They arrived at Alex's chosen destination sometime later, he was pleased Fox was waking up, shit if he had wanted a corpse he would have just shot him, at gunpoint. He ordered Fox out of the car and dragged him into the abandoned farm house, shoving him hard on the floor.

"Strip Agent Mulder now?"

"Fuck you Krycek, I don't think so."

"Oh I do, tell me Fox who's the one holding the gun?"

"Fuck off if you think I'm undressing think again, your only big and hard with a gun."

Alex threw the first aid kit on the bed and stared at Fox.

"Undress now and as for the gun, shit just because I never hit you before Fox, believe me I don't need a gun."

"What are we playing Doctor's or something Krycek? Sorry I forgot you need a first aid kit in your line of work."

"Fuck you Mulder, you take a first aid kit everywhere with you."

"I do not have one or need one Krycek."

"Let's see Fox your first aid kit is just over five foot, has red hair and answers to the name of Scully."

"You bastard, I told you I never need a first aid kit."

"God Fox you must be the fuckin blindest person I know, where there's danger you will always find Fox Mulder. Fuck you're like a magnet Mulder and I swear you’re drawn to trouble."

"Fuck off, then again your trouble, and I can't fuckin get away from you."

"Anyway back to the point, strip NOW Mulder."

"Like fuck."

"I will count to ten slowly, I swear if you have any clothes left on I will shoot you."

"So if you want to kill me Krycek, just fuckin do it."

"Oh no dear Fox I will only wound you, but believe me I will take great pleasure removing the bullet, with no fuckin anaesthetic."

"You would enjoy it, you sadistic fuck."

"ONE."

"Fuck you." Fox removed one shoe.

"TWO."

"Bastard." He removed the other shoe.

"THREE."

"Fuck Krycek, why?" he removed his socks.

"FOUR."

"Can’t we just fuckin talk?" he removed his tie

."FIVE."

"You sick bastard." Fox removed his jacket.

"SIX."

"Please just stop fucking counting?" he removed his shirt.

"SEVEN."

"Alex please." he removed his tee shirt.

"EIGHT."

"Why the hell are you doing this?" he removed his trousers.

"NINE."

"You sick sick fucking bastard." Fox removed his boxers and stood there naked.

"TEN."

Alex shot Fox in the thigh and watched the man crumple to the ground screaming. He bent down and cuffed Fox's hands behind his back, he could not resist stroking the mans ass.

"You sick fuckin bastard, I’m undressed what more do you want from me?"

"Learn this lesson well Fox, I ask once and only once, you make me count I will shoot so just shut up and let me remove the bullet."

"Don't you come anywhere near me, I would rather die than have you touch me."

"Is that one of the reasons you disliked me Fox, because I'm gay?"

"You can be as gay as you want Krycek, just not with me."

"Your mine Fox, and so is that pretty ass."

"I swear touch me Krycek, and I will kill you."

"Fox who has the gun and who's the one cuffed?"

"I swear I will find a way, you are a sick pervert."

Alex looked at Fox's leg, the bullet had passed through so he cleaned it up and covered it, he enjoyed stroking Fox's cock as he worked.

"Krycek get your fuckin hands off me, just let me go."

Alex dragged him off the floor, he threw him face down on the bed.

"Is that better Fox, a bit of comfort?"

"The only time I will feel comfortable Krycek, is when I know you’re fuckin dead."

"You mean dear Fox, you have never imagined fucking a man, or having a rock hard cock shoved up that tight pretty ass?"

"Stay the fuck away from me , you're a sick bastard Krycek."

Alex stood and removed all his own clothes, he then sat over Fox pinning him to the bed.

"What the fuck are you doing, get the hell off me Krycek?"

"I already told you Fox, your ass is mine and I will have it with or without your consent."

Alex sucked on a couple of his fingers, he then stroked and caressed Fox's ass until he found the small tight opening.

"So tight babe, god I can't wait to shove my cock up your ass."

Fox felt the fingers enter him, fuck he screamed as it hurt so much, he tried to move but he was trapped. Alex searched with his fingers until he found what he was looking for, he gently stroked Fox's prostate causing the man to cry out.

Within seconds he removed his fingers shoving his cock in their place, he grabbed Fox's cock forcing a full erection out of the unwilling man.

"I see your cock likes the attention, please babe don't cry, I want you to enjoy this."

"You sick raping fuckin bastard."

That was all Fox could say as the sobs racked his body, shit he could not decide which was worse. Getting raped, the fact it was a man, or because it was his worst enemy Alex Krycek, hell it was most probably all three.

"Yeah Fox I'm sick, but if raping you is the only way I get you, so be it."

Alex plunged his cock in and out of Fox jerking him off at the same time, Fox gave out a scream as his own body betrayed him. When Alex felt the man’s ass tighten around his cock he also came, he laid there for a while then went to get a cloth.

When he came back Fox would not even look at him, Alex gently wiped the semen from Fox and cleaned his ass, he could not help but notice the blood.  
He managed to get Fox to the bathroom and pointed the gun at him.

"Please Alex don't shoot me again, not unless you do it right and end my fuckin life."

"Just don't make any sudden moves Fox and it will be okay."

"How the fuck can it ever be okay, you fuckin raped me?"

Alex had removed the cuffs as he’d decided to change the position, he re cuffed the man’s hands in front of him.

"Look just go to the toilet and do what you have to, it’s been a long day and I just want to go to bed."

"So you plan on keeping me here all night?"

"Something like that, now move."

When Fox had finished in the bathroom, Alex led him to the bed and made him lay down and then he lay beside Fox and held him close.

"Shit you can let go as I'm cuffed and naked Alex, where the fuck do you think I could go?"

"Believe me when it comes to you Fox Mulder, I am taking no chances, knowing you and how you behave, shit yeah I think your capable of running out on me naked, please just go to sleep."

"Yeah right, like I can fuckin sleep while you're here."

"Fox shut the hell up, and at least try."

Sometime later Fox was woken up by the shouting, he realised it was Alex and that he was still asleep.

"Please Fox help me don't leave me here, its dark shit, I'm so scared, please Fox don't leave I love you."

Fuck Fox realised Alex was sicker than he thought and he wanted to throw up, he could never love Alex in return, he had to find a way to escape but to do that he would need some sleep.

"Good morning Fox, you sleep well?"

"Fuck you Alex, I want to go home."

"All in good time Fox, I'm sure you don’t want a repeat of yesterday."

"A repeat of what Alex, you shooting me or fuckin raping me?"

"Keep it up with that smart mouth Fox, as believe me I will fuckin repeat both at least twice over."

"Just shoot me now, at least I would not have to fuckin look at you."

"Poor Fox don't you like Alex giving you all his attention?"

"Fuck off Krycek, you're even sicker than I thought."

"Yeah Fox very sick as you see I have this problem, my cock is so hard it aches for you."

Alex rolled on top of Fox pinning him to the bed.

"I'm not gay, please Alex don't do this to me again."

Alex spat on his hand and wet his cock, he then forced it into Fox hard causing Fox to scream. He knew it would hurt but wanted him to learn.

"I get to look at your pretty face Fox while I fuck you."

Fox spat in his face and turned his head away.

"Fuck you, I hate you."

"Now now Fox nothing will ever get easier until you learn to control that mouth, such a waste as I could find a far better use for it."

"Don't you even think it you bastard, I swear I will bite it off.?”

"Why did I have to want someone who's so fuckin stubborn and has a death wish?"

Alex grabbed his t shirt off the floor and shoved it into Fox's mouth.

"I would like to get on and fuck you Fox, but learn if you can't talk to me nice, don't talk to me at all."

Alex worked up a rhythm, he knew looking into Fox's eyes and having him restrained he was losing it, his hot cum shot deep within the man’s ass.

"Your gorgeous Fox, do you know that."

Alex removed the t shirt from his mouth so that Fox could talk once more, not that he had anything nice to say.

"Bastard."

"Please Fox don't make me slap you hard."

"I want you to get the fuck off me."

"Fox you're so hard, would you rather come first?"

"Fuck I would rather suffer than have you touch me again."

Alex grabbed Fox's hard cock stroking it, fuck he needed to taste it more than anything. Alex watched his eyes and as soon as he saw his pupils dilate he took a chance, he deep throated the man’s large cock.

He felt Fox buck up on the bed, then his mouth filled with the essence of the man he loved. Despite his protests Fox realised his own body had betrayed him yet again.

"Oh god Fox that was fuckin great, you taste as good as you look."

Alex realised Fox was sobbing, fuck what was he doing to this man as he loved him but was tearing him apart. He held Fox tight and was scared to let go, however maybe he would have no choice in the end.

Fox could not stop the tears as he was just so confused, he remembered how Alex's mouth had felt around his cock, he lay there telling himself the same thing over and over again, its sick he's a man.

Alex lay there for a few minutes, he then moved on top of Fox pressing his weight against him, he licked the tears away and started kissing him.

"You belong to me Fox, I won't let you go, I was going to release you, but I can’t now, I need you babe."

He pressed harder against the man beneath him and moved down licking and kissing his body, he played and sucked on his nipples and then moved even lower. Fuck Alex was surprised to find Fox's cock rock hard.

"Is this for me babe as you only came five minutes ago, god you’re so beautiful Fox."

"I'm not gay, I'm not gay, I'm not gay."

"Don't cry Fox, is it because I turn you on and I'm a man, or it who I am?"

"I’m not gay you bastard, I hate you and you fuckin raped me."

Alex shoved Fox's hard cock into his mouth, fuck he loved the feel of him and never took long before he felt Fox come in his mouth.

"Fuck Alex, please don't stop, fuck just don't stop."

"Do you want me Fox?"

Fox lay there quiet, he could not believe he had shouted that as he came. Alex was confused by Fox, hell the man always been confusing but now more so than ever, did Fox have feelings or was it him forcing him to feel this way.

Deep down he knew he could never keep Fox here but he refused to end it yet, shit when Fox was released Alex's life would be over, he promised himself, he would let Fox go soon.

"Come on babe, we need a shower and food."

"Un cuff me Alex and I can manage on my own."

"Fox please I'm not that stupid, sorry, but you will have to have a shower with me so come on."

"Bastard."

"Fox you can insult me all you want, but it won't change anything."

Alex led Fox to the bathroom and turned on the shower, after Fox was under the water Alex joined him, he shoved Fox up against the wall biting his neck and licking him, he tried kissing Fox, but he pulled away.

"Don’t you want a kiss Fox as I want to taste your lips, let’s see we can do this the easy way where you just kiss me, or I can force you but either way I win."

"Fuck you I will never give myself to you willingly."

Alex grabbed Fox by the throat and squeezed hard, he then kissed Fox forcing his tongue into the mans open mouth.

  
"Fuck you taste good, see Fox it was not that bad was it?"

"You bastard, fuck you nearly strangled me."

"Next time just kiss me then."

"Never in a million years, you are one sick perverted bastard and I fuckin hate you."

"Now Fox calm down and behave while I wash you."

Fox had to stand there and endure the man’s hands all over his body, Alex went down on his knees and kissed his cock. Shit that was when Fox saw this as his only chance to escape, he lifted his cuffed hands and shoved Alex as hard as he could against the tiled wall.

He watched the man crumple to the floor and then noticed the blood, Fuck he had not planned to hit him that hard. He ran out of the shower and grabbed his clothes and knew he would have to dress later, he just needed the keys for the cuffs and the car, he noticed Alex's leather jacket on the chair.

Fox leaned over the chair and searched the pockets, finally his hand closed around a set of keys so maybe he could finally get away.

That was his last thought as he felt the pain on his scalp, fuck Alex yanked him up by his hair and threw him on the bed, then he felt the hard slap across his face and his head ached.

"Big mistake Fox, believe me I'm not nice when I get pissed off. Now I will punish you Fox, I don't want to hurt you but you must learn."

"You are a bastard Alex, whether you’re pissed off or not."

Alex slapped Fox hard across the face again, he then rolled him onto his stomach and grabbed the leather belt from the chair.

Fox screamed over and over again as the belt hit his bare ass, fuck it was agony.

"You made me do this Fox remember that, I never wanted to hurt you."

"Just fuckin kill me you sorry son of a bitch, because I will never be yours or do what you want."

"Is that what you really want Fox, because if you keep pushing me I might really hurt you, it’s your choice?"

"You bastard, you already have really hurt me or have you not noticed?"

Alex saw the large welts appearing on Fox's ass, fuck maybe he had gone too far, he threw the belt on the floor and started to lick the cuts.

"I am so sorry Fox shit I never meant to hit you that hard, I want to make love to you babe, I want to make everything better please let me?"

"If you want to make things better Alex let me go."

"You would kill me Fox."

"Shit I don't know anything anymore, hell I don't even know who I am?"

"Please talk to me Fox as I have done this to you, I love you but have hurt you so bad."

"I'm not gay Alex and shit, even if I was, do you really think that kidnapping and raping someone is how you go about things?"

"I'm so sorry Fox, I love you, and you hate me, what choice did I have?"

"Just let me go Alex as you know it's the right thing to do, why did you have to fall in love with me as I'm nothing special Alex?"

"I can't let you go not yet anyway, you really believe you're nothing don't you, fuck your gorgeous Fox, please behave, and I won't hurt you anymore."

"Fuck you as I'm not a fuckin puppet Alex, you can't make me do what you want."

"That's where you’re wrong I have managed so far."

"Only because you have a gun, this is so wrong Alex and you know it."

"Look please just shut up and leave it, I'm off to the toilet so do you think you can behave for two minutes, I swear Fox don't give me a reason to shoot you."

After Alex had left the room Fox moved, shit he knew he had no time to run, he went to Alex's jacket and grabbed the gun he knew was there. Alex walked out of the bathroom to be faced with Fox pointing a gun at him, shit he guessed the time had come for him to die.

"Get on your knees Alex and don't move."

"Please Fox, I am so sorry."

"Just shut the fuck up, I’m sick of listening to you."

"Please Fox when you pull the trigger remember I loved you for who you are, just fuckin shoot me and end it I don't want to live without you anyway."

"I am not a murderer Alex, I have no intention of killing you, even though you have given me enough reason, just un cuff me."

Alex removed the cuffs from Fox's wrists while still kneeling down, he then waited for what was to come.

Fox walked up to Alex and hit him over the head with the butt of the gun, he then grabbed his clothes and dressed and once he was ready he got the car keys and prepared to leave.

Fox got as far as the door, shit he could not leave without knowing if the man was okay, he realised Alex's head was bleeding in the same place as before, he grabbed the blanket and covered him then he bent down and kissed him on the cheek.

"Shit what have you done to me, I'm so fucked up now I don't even know what I want, goodbye Alex?"

Fox opened the door and left, not knowing if he would ever see Alex Krycek again.

Alex woke sometime later and he realised Fox had covered him with the blanket, hell and not even shot him. He knew he would have to move before the whole FBI turned up, he dressed and was left with no choice but to go on foot.

It took him quite a while to reach a main road and get a lift, he finally made it to a motel and safety. Alex knew he would never see or face the man he loved again, he finally just got on with life shitty jobs here and there as he needed the money and prepared for his next job.

Meanwhile Fox had gone back home and tried to get on with his life, he went back to work and told everyone he had been ill, he never told anyone about the time he was Alex's prisoner.

Fox was so confused as Alex had shot and raped him, but part of him missed the man and he felt sick for feeling like this. He also knew he wanted no harm to come to Alex, Scully and Skinner must never know what Alex had done to him.

Alex arrived at the place he was told to go, shit when he saw the feds swarm the place he knew he’d been set up. Shit that was when he found himself face to face with the man he loved and had shot and fuckin raped, Jesus he was face to face with special Agent Fox Mulder, how the hell would he get out of this?

XXXXXXXXXX

As much as Alex loved Mulder, he knew the man was very volatile.

"What do you want now Fox?"

"Get here Krycek, you are a murdering bastard and a liar."

"For fucks sake Fox, don't start all that again, I know it off by heart now."

"Fuck you Krycek, and the names Mulder."

"Shit I think you need to get laid more often, you might lose some of that tension Fox."

"You are one sick bastard Krycek, after what you did to me?"

"Maybe I am Fox, who knows?"

"Fuck its Mulder, not Fox."

"God you get all pissy over the small details Fox, calm down will you?"

"I will calm the fuck down, when you are cuffed and locked away."

"And do you think I will give myself to you willingly, hell maybe in different circumstances I might, the cuffs could be kinky."

"Give me strength you’re really one very sick man Krycek, believe me you will never touch me again."

"That’s me babe, one sick man, but if you really want me you will have to catch me first."

"Your one dead man Krycek when I do catch you."

Fuck I took off running as fast as I could, I had underestimated Fox as he was a runner and very fast, he soon had me trapped.

"Look, what do I have here, a cornered dirty rat bastard."

"Yeah and believe it or not Fox, a cornered rat will do anything to survive."

"Just give up Alex and let me cuff you, there's nowhere to run and its over."

"Why did you call me Alex, its not like you give a shit?"

I knew Fox was closing in on me, but hell if he arrested me I would be dead in no time at all.

"Well I could call you a traitor, murderer, and let’s not forget a fucking kidnapper and rapist."

"Fuck you Mulder."

"Thanks but no thanks Alex, you already fucked me."

"Come on Mulder, just fuckin finish it here and now, just end it."

"Oh I would love to finish it Alex, but as an F.B.I agent I will have to make do with arresting you."

"Please Mulder, you take me in and I'm dead."

Oh shit Mulder lunged forward and grabbed me, I slammed into the brick wall behind me, then everything went black.

XXXXXXXXXX

I awoke sometime later confused and not knowing where I was, I then recognised the room, oh shit it was Mulder's bedroom, and he had his arm around me, then I heard his voice.

"Make love to me babe, I need to feel you in me Alex."  
Oh shit what the fuck was going on here, I must have been drugged or something.

"Fox are you feeling okay, and why the fuck am I here?"

"What's the matter sexy?"

"Will you stop fucking calling me sexy and shit, what the fuck have you done to me?"

"Fuck you Alex, I thought you loved me and wanted to be here so what changed?"

"Fox did you drug me and bring me here?"

Fuck it, I could not stop the tears from falling, if Fox wanted to destroy me this was the way, the pain in my heart was worse than any beating from him.

"Alex you are really starting to scare me, why do you think I would hurt you when I love you?"

"Fox you never loved me, shit and the only time we had sex was when I raped you, is this your way of revenge?"

"Please Alex, we got over that, I love you and want to make love to you."

"I know it's a trick Fox, please just let me go."

"I guess I will have to show you to make you believe then."

I felt Fox move down the bed and I realised, we were both naked, shit my own body was betraying me, my cock liked the thought of a naked Fox. Fuck I had to get out of here and very fast.

"Don't you dare to touch me Fox, where the fuck are my clothes?"

"Alex please don't do this, don't leave me alone."

Fuck I am finally losing it and going mad, what the hell was I going to do, mind you if I have to die or go mad, what better way than with Fox.

"Please Fox don't fuck with my head as I've always loved you and always will, I can't stand the lies."

I felt his lips on mine kissing me, his tongue probing my mouth, then his hand was playing with my nipple tugging it, shit I was so hard it hurt.

"I am not lying to you Alex, I love you so much."

"Shit I don't know what to say to you Fox, I’m so scared that it's all a trick to get your own back on me."

"Okay babe actions speak louder than words, I will make love to you then you will understand how I feel about you."

Oh fuck the next thing I felt was Fox's luscious lips around my throbbing cock, I would come soon if he kept this up. His mouth was suddenly gone then I felt my ass cheeks part, oh god he was fucking me with his tongue, I could feel it enter my ass sliding in and out.

"Please Fox fuck me now, I can't take any more of this."

"Its okay babe, just a bit longer then you can come, I promise."

Shit I felt his fingers enter my tight hole slipping in and out loosening me up, then they were gone, but before I knew it I felt Fox's hard cock enter my ass, when he hit my prostate I screamed out.

"I told you I would make love to you, come for me Sasha."

I could not think, shit I had lost all reasonable thought, his cock was up my ass and his hand around my cock. I could hold it back no longer coming all over his hand, I was yelling out his name as I tightened my ass and I felt Fox's hot cum enter my ass, he was licking my cum off his hand then he kissed me, fuck he was so sexy. I lay there out of breath my one dream had finally come true, Fox Mulder really loved me and wanted me.

"Are you ok babe as you’re very quiet?"

"Yeah, fuck that was amazing Fox."

"Well you have never complained before babe."

"Fox why do you have so many names for me?"

"Such as?"

"You call me Babe, Sasha and god knows what else."

"You are my gorgeous sexy babe, and it never bothered you before Alex and as for Sasha, you know why."

"It’s Russian for my name but why do you call me it?"

"Are you sure you’re okay Alex, you know if I call you from work I have to call you that as in this country it's a unisex name, shit Scully thinks I have some gorgeous girlfriend."

"Shit I'm sorry for all the questions Fox and I really don't know what's wrong with me, maybe if I rest for a while I might be okay."

I lay there trying to work everything out but I remembered nothing, so I closed my eyes and tried not to think at all and maybe some sleep would help.

I awoke a few hours later to find Fox still beside me, god how I loved this man, my sweet gorgeous sexy Fox.

"Kiss me Fox so I know all of this is real?"

"One kiss babe as we really need a shower."

We shared a deep meaningful kiss, Fox then dragged me off to the shower.

"Fox do you expect me to share a shower with you."

"Don't be all shy on me now Alex, we always share a shower after sex. Shit when you banged your head on the cupboard yesterday you passed out, fuck it might be concussion Alex, we will have a shower and go to see the Doctor."

"I don't remember banging my head or anything."

"Okay Alex what do you remember then."

"Shit I always loved you Fox, but all I remember is you hating me and punching me. hell I hurt you so much and I even raped you to get what I wanted, how could you possibly even like me yet you stand there telling me you love me?"

"That was a long time ago Alex, shit I will be honest with you, I always felt something towards you but hated you at the same time, hell, then I realised just what you really mean to me and hate turned to love. I don't think I could ever be without you again not now, it scares the hell out of me that you might not remember, and I might lose you."

"Fuck even if I never remember Fox I will be with you as long as you want me here."

"Come on let’s clean up and see what the Doctor thinks is wrong with you Alex."

The shower was very intimate, we washed each other stopping now and again to share a few kisses, then I dried him and he returned the favour, then we dressed and Fox dragged me to see the Doctor.

I just sat there like an idiot while Fox explained everything to the Doctor, finally he decided to talk to me.

"How do you feel in yourself Alex, this must be very hard for you, also it has been a while, since we last spoke?"

"You mean I know you, shit I don't even remember."

"I have been you Doctor for about six years Alex, Fox tells me you can remember certain things from your past."

"Oh yeah, like how he has always hated me and beat the shit out of me and wishes I was dead."

"Calm down Alex, I believe the bang to your head has blocked out the past few years, your only remembering the bad times, in my opinion I believe you’re afraid of losing what you now have."

"I’m not afraid of anything, shit I can't be with the life I have."

"Okay I will rephrase that, you always wanted Fox, now you have him you’re afraid you will lose him and be alone again."

The Doctor gave me a smile and turned to talk to Fox.

"All Alex needs is some love, comfort and time, it’s up to you Fox to keep reminding him how much you love him and what he means to you."

"That's fine with me Doctor, I am sure I can think of a few ways to remind Alex how much I love him."

We finally stood up, thanked the doctor and left, I was so glad to be out of there, Fox grabbed my hand and kissed me.

"I love you Alex, don't worry we will work this out I promise, shall we go grab something to eat babe?"

"Sounds good, but only if you agree, after we eat you start showing me comfort and love."

"Well you're already starting to sound like the Alex I know."

"Yeah but is that a good thing Fox?"

"Alex babe believe me it's a good thing, I love your charm and wit."

"Are you been funny Fox, you always hated me with a vengeance?"

"Look Alex, we will get over this, but you have to stop fighting me and only seeing the negative side of things. Keep fighting me, and I might have to put you over my knee and spank you."

"Sounds good to me."

"Come on my kinky hunk, let’s eat."

We found somewhere to eat, we had an English breakfast then drove to Fox's apartment, which he claimed was OUR home, I just went along with it all as I was so scared of losing Fox. I was tired and wanted to rest, I just sat on the couch thinking about all the recent events.

"Do you want a beer babe?"

"That sounds good Fox, I could use one."

"Kiss me first Alex, then I will get you the beer."

"Fuck I'm tired Fox, just get the beer, then I will kiss you."  
"Alex are you been naughty and refusing to do as I say, shit you never could take an order could you?"

"Fox I just need a drink, and as for orders, I can follow them if I have too."

"Prove it here and now Alex."

I looked up to see Fox pouting and he looked so sexy, shit how could any man resist him, out of all the men in the world Fox wanted just me, shit I knew I would give in to him.

"Okay Fox give me an order then and I will prove it, but only if it's something I can do."

"I will only give orders I know you’re capable of doing Alex and orders that won't hurt you, too much anyway."

"Shit what the hell have I just agreed too?"

"Don't worry Alex, you will be okay."

"Okay Fox dearest just give me an order then."

"Okay your first order let’s see, I want to see you naked babe."

"Just great Fox, you know how to humiliate me."

"Just strip now Alex, and no it's not to humiliate you, I just want you to remember all the times we have been naked in front of each other before."

"Fine I will strip but what about you?"

"We will see babe, maybe later."

Shit I had to stand there in front of him and remove all my clothes, he had fucked me up the ass with his tongue and cock. Yet I felt embarrassed naked now while he was dressed, then I remembered the farmhouse and how I had made Fox strip at gunpoint, fuck maybe this was revenge.

"Please Fox don't stare at me like that."

"God Alex you’re gorgeous and so sexy, don't be ashamed in front of me as I love you and your body babe."

"Look Fox just give me the fucking orders without the bullshit."

"Just sit Alex and have your drink, but be warned if you keep answering back you will suffer later, you have to learn to follow orders without questioning all the time."

I sat there having my drink, shit I felt like a naughty school boy wondering what Fox planned to do next.

"Now that you have finished your drink babe come and sit next to me."  
"Like I have a choice Fox."

"You always have the choice Alex to prove I'm right, and that you can't follow orders."

"Fuck you Fox."

"Alex stop swearing, I know you want to sit here with me, so just move your cute ass now."

"Fuck your bossy Fox."

Oh shit I got up and moved next to him, within seconds, he was playing with my nipples then his hand found my hard cock.

"Fox please tell me you’re not going to torment me?"

"Questioning again are you babe, that's very naughty."

"Please Fox."

"Bend over my knee Alex, now."

"What the fuck?"

"Alex do as I say without the questioning or the swearing."

I swear Fox had gone mad, shit as I lay there I could feel the bulge in his trousers, as for me I lay there naked with my ass in the air. I never expected the hard slap I felt across my backside, then another and another, shit my ass hurt.

"Are you going to behave now Alex, god your ass is so sexy when it's all red and hot?"

"Please Fox, I need to come now."

"You might want to come babe, but you don't need to yet."

"I know what I fuckin need Fox."

"I already said no swearing Alex."

"Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you."

Shit Fox slapped me four more times hard, my ass throbbed along with my poor abandoned cock.

"A slap for every time you swore babe."

"Please Fox, I'm dying here."

"Don't be so dramatic Alex, I think we need to cool your ass down first."

Fuck that was relief as I felt Fox's hand apply the cool liquid, shit I nearly fell off his knee as I felt his long finger enter my ass, twisting and stretching me, then his other hand grabbed my balls, fuck I knew I was going to come soon.

"Fox please, I really need to come now."

"I want to fuck you Alex, no I want to make love to you."

I felt Fox remove his fingers, then he pushed me to the floor.

"Fox please fuck me now."

"I give the orders Alex, and I say when you can come, go now and lay on the bed, oh and Alex lay on your back, I want to see your gorgeous eyes as you come."

Fuck I was starting to really believe Fox's game would kill me soon, but I obeyed and did as I was told, it felt like I was alone on that bed for a long while. Fuck this I would just jerk off, shit then I noticed Fox stood naked in the doorway.

"Hands off now Alex, you make yourself come and I won’t look or even touch you for a whole month."

Shit, I dropped my hands down on the bed by my sides.

"So wanton Alex, my own little slut, fuck you are really sexy when you’re desperate."  
"God I am begging Fox, please end this and fuck me now?"

"No babe we are going to take this slow and make love."

I felt Fox on top of me, kissing me and stroking my face, then I felt his hard cock nudge at the entrance of my lubed ass, I could wait no longer and shoved my hips and ass up to meet his cock.

Then Fox shoved hard against me hitting my prostate and god I needed this, I swear Fox was going slow on purpose then he suddenly pulled his cock all the way out, only to ram it back in hard, fuck I felt my balls tighten up just before I came all over us both. Fox came only a minute later, I just lay there sobbing.

"Please Alex, I am sorry shit I never meant to treat you like that and hurt you, you used to like it babe, please forgive me?"

"I am not upset Fox, shit I am crying because I am so happy, I love you so much and you really want me, god even after all I did to you."

"Of course I want you babe, your mine, and I am yours, together always, it's the past Alex, we got over it a long time ago."

"You really mean it don't you Fox?"

"Oh Alex, please believe me, I love you and won't ever let you go."

"I love you too Fox, together forever just me and you."

We were both exhausted and lay in each other’s arms until sleep claimed us both.

XXXXXXXXXX

Fuck my head hurt really bad, shit where the hell was I now?

I realised it was a hospital and all I wanted was Fox here with me, I felt so alone without him but then a nurse came over to see if I was okay now.

"Why am I here, what happened to me?"

"You took a bang to the head Mr Krycek."

"Where's Fox, how did I get here?"

"You were brought to casualty by an FBI agent."

"Was he tall and good looking?"

"That would be him, he said he would come back later."

"Do you know when?"

"No but I suggest you rest for now Mr Krycek."

I lay there drifting in and out of sleep waiting for Fox, two hours later he finally arrived, he came right up to the bed and leaned over me.  
"Well well look who's finally awake."

I could not resist those sexy lips, I grabbed him by his coat pulling him towards me and I then kissed him hard thrusting my tongue deep into his hot wet mouth.

"I missed you Fox."

"Krycek you sick perverted bastard, get your fucking hands off me."

"Please Fox don't talk to me like that, what have I done to you?"

"Fuck you really need to ask, let’s see, you piss me off, betray me, kill my father, shoot and rape me and then you fucking kiss me, is that not enough for you Krycek."

"You forgave me Fox, you were so kind when we made love and even wiped the tears away, please don't do this."

"Fuck back up a bit Krycek, I have not now and not ever made love to you and I never will."

"Please Fox don't lie, I really need you now."

"You sick sick fucking bastard, remove your hands NOW Krycek."

Shit the nurse and doctor tried to calm me down as they had to pries my fingers from Fox's coat, then I felt the needle in my arm and the Dr telling me to rest. No I wanted to stay awake and talk to Fox, I heard the nurse and Fox talk as I drifted into a deep sleep.

"What the hell is wrong with Krycek?"

"We don't know, he seems very disturbed but you agent Mulder appear to be the root of his problems."

"The only problems Alex Krycek has are the ones he made on his own."

"Please agent Mulder stay until he wakes up, we need to deal with this problem as Mr Krycek appears to be mentally unbalanced at present."

I came around a short while later, fuck my arm was cuffed to the bed and Fox sat in the chair watching me, god I felt so nervous.

"You're awake Krycek, well as far as I am concerned you can rot in hell but the nurse and Scully convinced me to help you, not like you deserve it but it’s the humane thing to do blah blah blah what the hell would they know."

"You cuff me to the fucking bed and deny everything, what can I say Fox to convince you I love you and we had great sex plus a home together”

"I told you we have never had any form of sex Alex except when you kidnapped me and raped me, I have never been willing, shit a full grown man yet I cried because of what you did to me and as for the cuffs, well they are for my protection as you keep molesting me."

"You loved me, you promised we would be with each other forever."

"Look Alex, I really think you need medical help."

"So what are you saying Fox, there is no me and you and never will be."

"Yes as that's the truth Alex, I don't want to have to lie and give you false hope as you must face reality."

"Fuck you then Fox, I have nothing worth living for anymore."

Within seconds I grabbed the glass off the table next to my bed and smashed it, I then sliced through my cuffed wrist, I remember Fox holding me, trying to stop the bleeding as I passed out.

When I finally woke my wrist was bandaged, and I was restrained to the bed, I looked up to see Fox, shit his coat was covered in my blood.

"Am I in hell then?"

"No Alex you’re alive even after your stupid stunt but you're been moved to a psychiatric hospital for your own good."

"You could have let me die. Fox as it would have been better than this, locked away on my own again, just kill me now I am nothing to you."

"You just need help Alex and despite our past you are a man and deserve better."

"Fuck you Fox, I won't be locked up again, not by Spender and not by you, you’re just like that cancerous bastard, lock me up and throw away the key."

"Alex this is not the same as Spender left you to die and as for you Alex, you have no choice but I will visit once a week, maybe Scully was right and I helped fuck you up."

"Please Fox don't come, I don't want or need your pity."

"Goodbye Alex I will see you in a week."

"Bastard."

That was the last word I said to Fox as he walked out of the door, I was moved and put on twenty four hour suicide watch, I hated it here, shit I had to get out, the first week was really bad as I refused to eat or even speak to anyone.

Fox came as promised but I would not even look or talk to him, on one of his visits he went on about my obsession with him, I lost it big time and tried to hit him and make him see sense.

 I was weak due to the lack of food and all I got from my outburst was a padded cell, I refused to see anyone as what was the point anyway, what I wanted I could never have and my life was over as far as I was concerned?

Over the weeks I became like a zombie, they gave me injections containing vitamins, also anti-depressants, I kicked and screamed until I ended up in a strait jacket. After three months I became nothing but a shell, yet the bastards forced me to live.

I had only seen Fox twice in the last 3 months as I refused to see him, but Fox was cunning and claimed he had to see me on urgent FBI business.  
I later found myself drugged and awoke to find myself restrained to the bed, they had removed the straight jacket, and Fox was in the chair just sitting there with his usual sexy pout.

"You bastard Fox, get the hell out of here I told you not to come here."

"Alex I only want to talk, please let me."

"I have nothing to say to you Mulder, you made it clear where we stand."

"Just listen to me then."

"It’s not like I have a choice Mulder, not in my current predicament."

"Alex I know you believe I hate you now, but we have always had a rough relationship, and your not the Alex, I know anymore, you are pathetic, and if you don't pull yourself together soon, you will spend the rest of your life locked up, where's all the fight in you gone?"

"What's it to you Mulder?"

"I’m human Alex and I care, you may be my enemy but even you deserve better than this."

"But you don't love me so there's no point to any of this, shit I just want to die."

"I care and that's all Alex, I’m sorry if you wanted more, more than I can give you."

"So why does it matter if I stay here then, or if I die?"

"Because it's not you, where has the real Alex gone?"

"He died the day I found out it was all a fuckin dream."

"I don't believe that Alex and the real you is in there somewhere, look I must go now but think about what I said."

"Fox will you promise to come back?"

"We will see, but you must learn to depend on yourself again Alex, goodbye for now."

I spent the next month on some medication and I ate, after a month they removed all the restraints. I was doing well until Fox visited me, shit he told me he would not be coming anymore as it was up to me now.

 I went back to my room and went berserk smashing up everything, I even head butted the wall a few times, I was finally sedated and restrained yet again.

Sometime later it hit me, I only had two more months before my case would be reviewed, shit I knew I could never convince Fox of my love for him in here, especially as he never came anymore.

I was left with no choice, I had to convince the doctors that I was sane.  
I listened to them go on and on, I became the model patient as I told them what they wanted to hear. A part of me had returned and I could be devious and tough, they believed I had recovered, while in reality I was weak and still obsessed with Fox Mulder.

Well after six months in a place like that sure as hell gave me time to think, I had always had feelings towards Fox and I wanted the life I’d dreamt about back, as I felt cheated. I wanted Fox as mine and one way or another, I would make sure I got what I wanted. I wanted that life back even if it meant holding him hostage again, I would get him sooner or later.

I was so tired, I had been following Fox for about three months now, watching him from afar or hidden in the shadows just waiting, hell I even went to his apartment while he was at work. It was too much all the memories of us together came flooding back.

I am sat outside a gay bar wondering if I should just forget about him (shit as if I could). Oh and what do I see, you may make out your straight Fox, god I wonder about you and what you really think, shit I think you need to profile yourself.

Do I turn you on Fox, fuck that bloke with his tongue around your tonsils is dead I swear, but look at him, tall dark with black jeans and leather jacket?  
You finally get a cab home, on your own I might add, is he not good enough for you to take home Fox.

I decided to follow you keeping my distance, when you arrive home safe I planned to drive away, but I could not help myself.  
I got the black spray paint from the boot of my car, and then I left you that message on your apartment door...  
YOU ARE MINE FOX  
A. K

Fuck what an idiot, I had even added my initials, then when you went back to work, I followed you to that motel but you knew didn't you Fox that I was stalking you.

I stood there in the shadows waiting, then I felt something against my head and heard the safety catch of a gun, your gun Fox.

"Move now Krycek, or I will shoot you."

"Please Fox, where are we going, shit I am so sorry please just let me go?"

"Move Alex, get inside my room now before Scully sees you."

"Okay but, please put the gun away."

"No chance Alex, just sit on the chair and don't move, tell me Alex is the gun enough or do I need to cuff you."

"Shit Fox I won't hurt you, please let me leave."

"You sit there and obey me Alex, no questions, you don't take orders do you?"

Shit no, I was falling apart, all the memories of that night and the games we played, obey Alex, ask no questions Alex, don't be a naughty boy Alex, fuck I was finally going mad.

"God you're so bossy Fox, and you don't even realize it."

  
"Shut up Krycek."

"Can't you decide what you want to call me Fox, what's it to be Alex or Krycek."

"Shut up Alex, I don't want to even hear you, but you will hear me, do you understand?"

"I always hear you Fox."

"Don't be clever Alex, I am not yours not now not ever, I got your message on my door Alex, and I am well aware that you have been following me around."

"I'm sorry Fox, I just wanted to be close that's all."

"I want you to walk out of here Alex and stay the fuck away from me, don't follow me, don't talk to me, stay out of my life, is this going into that thick head of yours yet?"

"Please Fox"

"Shut up Alex walk out now, stay away or I will kill you."

"Do it then Fox, here and now, kill me and end it all, because I sure as hell don't want to live anymore."

"NOW ALEX MOVE."

Shit here I was again obeying him, I got up and went to the door...

"I am sorry Fox, I would do anything to change the past."

"Goodbye Alex."

"I'm sorry for loving you Fox."

I never said another word neither did Fox, I walked away towards my car, where I sat for a while just thinking, I realised, I needed to be a lot more careful when I next followed him.

I followed Fox for over a month and I took great care so he wouldn’t see me, to me the dream of our life together and making love seemed real, I now needed more and to be close.

Like an idiot, I broke into his apartment and hid in the bedroom waiting for him to return from work, shit when I heard the apartment door open I panicked, god what if he found me, I stayed as quite as I could and would have to wait until he was asleep before I left.

An eternity later Fox shoved a video in and lay on the couch, I soon realised it was one of his porn videos so I crept as close as I could and watched him. Fuck he lay there with his eyes closed and his cock in his hand, I watched as he stroked and caressed himself and I never took my eyes off him until he came, fuck I could not believe what I was seeing Fox was so hot and sexy.

I wanted Fox more than ever and I could feel my own hard cock imprisoned in my jeans, Fox never even moved to clean himself and, it was not long before his breathing changed, I knew he was now asleep.

I knew I had spent too long here and had to get out now, I got as far as his apartment door then I just turned around and walked back towards him. Shit I was like a moth to a flame, I could not resist him at any cost.

I kissed him gently on the lips making sure I never woke him, my Fox and only mine, shit I could not control myself, I could smell the cum and the scent of sex on him. I must have lost all sense of reason as I slowly pulled his boxers to one side exposing his cock, I started licking the cum from him, which even in his sleep was starting to turn hard again.

God he felt so good, then I felt a hand in my hair as I was yanked up from his cock so hard I could feel some of my hair come out, I was then shoved hard onto the floor.

"Oh god Alex I don't even know where to start, you are one very sick man or have a secret death wish."

"Please Fox, I never meant to go that far."

"You are so full of shit Alex what the hell was you doing here, no on second thoughts don't answer that, I really don't need to know, but I hope you know what you did is sexual assault?"

"But I love you Fox."

"I swear to god, I will kill you Alex, I’m not fucking gay yet you rape me and keep molesting me."

"Yeah Fox your as straight as they come, that's why I saw you one night with some blokes tongue wrapped around your tonsils."

Well I guess I went too far as I never knew when to shut up, Fox grabbed me by my jacket and pulled me from the floor, shit he was really pissed off now.

"I fucking hate you Alex, do you understand me, maybe I should kill you, hell say it was self-defence, because right now I really wish you were dead."

With that Fox punched me hard in the face causing my lip to split and my nose to bleed.

"Look at you Alex shit you are pathetic, yet you act the hard man but you are nothing do you understand?"

I tried to speak but my face was a mess what with the blood and the tears, hell maybe he was right, pathetic worthless Alex Krycek that's me.

"You leave me alone Alex, if I so much as see you anywhere near me or my apartment, I will have you locked up as insane and have you charged with sexual assault."

Fox grabbed my jacket and pulled me close to him.....

"Simple Alex just fuck off before I have you locked up or end up shooting you, oh shit your sicker than I thought even you could be Alex, your turned on and hard for me despite what I have just done to you. You make me sick and even if you were the last man alive I would not be interested."

Before I could answer he opened the door and threw me out, then slammed the door shut on me, shit I knew that I was lucky to be alive after what I had just done, then again if I was to die, I could think of no one better to end my life.

I know that I am going to end up dead or locked up if I don't end this, but I am unable to stop myself. I still had contacts within the consortium and learned of Fox's whereabouts from time to time, but I tried my dam hardest to stay away from him and just watch him from afar.

I have learnt that Fox keeps getting close to the truth and that he’s really pissing off that cancerous bastard. I can't even warn Fox not that he would ever believe me now, I was no longer able to protect the man I loved and I was no good for anything now.

I hacked into the FBI system to see what case Fox was working on so I could make sure he was safe, fuck I was already too late as Fox had been missing since yesterday morning, the FBI was still unable to locate his whereabouts.

Shit I knew Cancerman was behind all of this, time to pay the smoking man a visit. I had made mistakes while working for the consortium but they always found a need to keep me around, if I could just stay calm I might learn where they have Fox.

I walked in to Cancer mans office to find him behind the desk, the room was full of the usual smoke.

"Hello Alex how nice of you to drop in, what do I owe this pleasure?"

"I just wanted to know if you wanted anything doing, oh I also hear Mulders out of the picture now."

"Yes Alex it’s true, Fox was naughty and would not learn to stay away, we had to deal with him for the project Alex."

"Yeah I know Mulder never knew when to quit, so did you kill him?"

"Tell you what Alex, as I have no immediate plans for the next hour I will show you Fox and let you know what is to become of him."

"You mean he's still alive?"

"Come with me Alex, and you will see for yourself."

I followed the black lunged bastard down into the basement, I was led to a room I knew they used for torture and violence. Believe it or not I myself had been here in the past, Cancerman unlocked the door.

"Go on then Alex, take a look at what we have done to him."

I entered the room then heard the door slam shut and lock behind me, shit what was I thinking.

"Now you know where Fox is, you can share the same fate as him, you never learn do you Alex, I knew all along you was attracted to my dear son, you would betray anyone to protect him including me."

"Fuck your one dead man when I get out."

"You are as much of a liability as him Alex, I have no use for you whatsoever, goodbye Alex, use your remaining time well."

I looked around, it was dark and freezing, I could only just make out the figure on the floor. Shit Fox was either asleep or worse so I had to see what they’d done to him, I went over and knelt beside him and felt for a pulse. Fox was naked and freezing cold, but what shocked me more was his quite voice as he spoke.

"Don't worry, I’m alive Alex, well at least for now anyway."

"Please Fox don't talk like that."

"Shit all I know is I have been here hours, I am freezing to death."

"What do you want me to do Fox?"

"Just hold me, please Alex make me warm."

"Oh shit, please Fox this is your idea, all I ask is for you not to punch me again."

"I won't hurt you Alex, I promise, I just don't want to die down here."

I sat down on the floor and wrapped my jacket around Fox, then I held him close to my own body, I kept hold of him tightly hoping he would share my own body heat.

"Why are you crying Alex?"

"I'm not crying, just drop it Fox."

"Alex we are stuck down here, hell we might even die here, so please talk to me."

"I said drop it and like you don't know what's wrong anyway."

"I can feel the tears, oh shit it's not a game is it, you really do love me don't you Alex?"

"Yeah Fox I really love you and must be the biggest fucking idiot walking."

"It's okay Alex, I think I understand now, I really believed it was all a game and that you’d been put up to it to destroy me. After you raped me and I escaped I started wanting you more and more, shit I kept telling myself it was wrong and I would end up betrayed."

"God I can't blame you for not believing me as I’ve betrayed you before, but I have loved you for a long time. Are you trying to tell me you have feelings for me Fox?"

"Let’s just say I fell for you big time, and yes Alex I went in search of men who looked like you, but as usual I always learn everything too late."

"Why is it too late as we can work something out together, please Fox don't push me away now?"

"Alex I don't want to push you away, but I really believe we will die in this room."

"Shit Fox I don't know what to say, but hell if you really care about me I’m not prepared to die now."

"I really think that cancerous bastard plans to get rid of me this time, all the years I was alone and now I find love it's too late"

"I love you too Fox, we will find a way out and be with each other."

We finally fell asleep in each other’s arms, shit I woke up when I heard the door, I knew I was no match against the four large men who had entered. I was forced down on to a chair to be tied up and gagged, I had to sit there while they removed the jacket from Fox, they then dragged him from the room.

Fuck I knew I could not help him all I could do was wait, he had finally accepted my love for him and now I had to pray they wouldn’t kill him.  
Fox was returned sometime later and was thrown on the floor, I was then untied and shoved on to the floor with him.

We then found ourselves alone again, Fox was still freezing and he was also now covered in bruises. I put my jacket over him and held him close to me, I knew if Fox stayed here much longer he would die as he was slipping in and out of consciousness. His body was slowly shutting down and I had to do something.

It had been years since I had been down here, shit to torture and to be tortured, but I remembered talk back then about an escape route, it was designed so the torturer could escape if something went wrong.

Fuck I had never asked or needed to know where it was until now, I lay Fox down and started my search as I felt along the walls and found nothing. Shit Fox had admitted his feelings I could not let him freeze to death now, I finally managed to find the trap door in the floor.

I went over to check on Fox and get my car keys, at least my car keys were still in my pocket where I’d left them. I knew how to hot wire a car but this would be faster, I decided to check where the tunnel led, I stopped to kiss Fox once before I left.

"I love you Fox, please just hold on a while longer."

I followed the long tunnel and it led to an exit away from the main building, shit it had taken twenty minutes to get here and even running I would need about another ten minutes to get to my car. I turned back the way I had come, no way was I leaving here without my lover.

When I was in the tunnel I had realised it was colder than the room Fox was in, I had to prepare him for that, when I returned Fox was awake, and he just sat there sobbing.

"You did what they wanted Alex, why?"

"Fox please, I have no idea what you mean."

"You went to them and left me, why did you come back, or is it you they sent to kill me?"

"Oh god Fox, I found a trap door and a way out, shit you was asleep, I never thought about you waking while I was gone, I love you."

"So you could have just escaped, but you chose to come back for me?"

"You really think I would just leave you here to die."

"I am so sorry Alex, shit I finally admit how I feel then you disappear, I just thought it was a game."

"It’s okay Fox as I’m as much to blame for leaving you here, do you think you can move and walk."

"My legs are weak and my teeth keep chattering, but if it means escape, I’m willing to try anything."

"Okay Fox, I want you just to sit there for a minute."

I stood and removed my shoes then my jeans, I was left in just my boxers and a t shirt, I realised Fox was looking at me with a worried look on his face.

"Alex what the fuck are you doing, please I do love you but I can't do it right now, shit I hurt too much."

"Can't do what right now, oh god as much as I would love to make love to you Fox, I know now's not the right time."

"Why the hell are you undressing then?"

"God you ask way too many questions Fox, just put the shoes and jeans on, oh and make sure you fasten the jacket up."

"What about you, shit Alex you will freeze?"

"It's okay Fox, I'm warmer than you, and if we make it to the car it will be warm."

"Ok Alex let’s do this then."

"Come on then, but Fox remain silent and stay close."

I opened the hatch, as soon as we were both inside I closed it behind us, shit it felt good leaving that room. I held on to Fox's hand and led him down the tunnel, it had taken over thirty minutes with Fox as due to the cold he couldn’t move as fast as me.

Even I was starting to freeze in my present state of dress, finally we arrived at the exit, and I climbed out, but knew I would have to go through it alone to get the car.

"Fox I need to go get the car and to go back for it will take me about ten minutes, please just wait here for me and don't try anything stupid just wait."

"Please Alex don't leave me alone again."

I realised Fox was crying and that he was petrified to be alone, however I knew he would slow me down. I needed to reach the car and get us away from here as soon they would realize we had gone, I took off my watch and handed it to Fox.

"Take the watch Fox, give me fifteen minutes, and I promise I will return."

"What if you get caught Alex?"

"Shit Fox I’m praying that I don't, but if I do I guess I will see you back in that cell."

"Please be careful Alex and come back to me."

"Fox I love you and will not leave without you, just pass me the car keys out of my jacket."

I took the keys from Fox then kissed him and left to get the car, it was freezing outside so I just ran as fast as I could. I never looked back until I reached my car, once inside I turned up the heating and went to collect Fox.

"Come on Fox, hurry up and get in the car."

"You came back for me?"

"Yeah I came back, I can see we are going to have to work hard on the matter of trust, but for now let’s get the hell out of here."

Once we were both in the car I hit the accelerator and sped away as fast as I could.

"How do you feel now Fox, are you reasonably okay?"

"I'm fine Alex, I just need some sleep and to get warm, how about you are you okay?"

"I'm fine Fox, don't worry I've suffered worse in the past."

"Do you know where we are going Alex?"

"Yeah, I have a lock up a few miles away, we can switch cars and grab some clothes."

"Then what?"

"We will drive for a couple of hours, find a motel and sleep."

"God you really plan ahead Alex."

"I have to Fox, working for that cancerous bastard does not make me safe, even Spender would take me out if I piss him off."

"And I guess you have pissed him off big time now?"

"I have been pissing him off for a while, but now he really wants me dead."

It was nearly three hours later, we had both dressed, swapped cars and found a motel, as we opened the door the warmth met us.

"We will get some sleep Fox and rest, we can decide in the morning what we will do."

"Yeah I am really tired, but at least we are free now."

Fox slowly undressed and got into bed, I had stood and watched as he had stripped out of all his clothes, how I loved him.

"You get some sleep Fox, I will lock up and sleep over in the chair."

"Alex please come and lay beside me, I need to feel you and know I'm not alone."

"If you are really sure Fox?"

"If I wasn’t sure I wouldn’t have asked, please Alex come here."

I undressed as far as my boxers and got into the bed and I just lay there afraid to move, then I felt Fox put his arm around me. He pulled me close and kissed me on the lips, god I was like a scared teenager all over again.

"Alex will you tell me the truth if I ask you something?"

"Go on ask then, if I’m able to answer you I will."

"When I arrived at the hospital why did you insist we had made love, and then kiss me?"

"Please Fox don't bring all that up again, it must have been the bang on my head."

"I really need to know Alex, what was I like in your dream?"

"I woke up in your bed, you held me and told me you loved me, you even made love to me, but what's it matter it was all a dream."

"But I do love you Alex, can I just ask, did I ever hit you?"

"No Fox, you were gentle and never hurt me, oh except for the time you spanked me."

"Did it turn you on?"

"Fuck Fox you had me over your knee with my bare ass in the air, after you slapped my ass you fucked it with your fingers, so yeah I was fully turned on."

"That sounds like fun, I will have to remember that in the future, will you let me make love to you Alex?"

"Please Fox don't mess with my head, I swear I will go mad."

"I meant it Alex when I said that I loved you, we will sleep on it and then in the morning we can make love, just relax babe and don't worry."

"I love you Fox, I want to believe you but your right we both need some sleep, I love you Fox and have for a very long time."

"I love you too Alex, shit I think I have for a while now, it just took a while for me to realize it."

I cried myself to sleep the one and only man I had ever wanted loved me. I awoke some hours later, fuck my cock was throbbing, I looked down to find Fox's mouth around my hard cock.

"Shit I always did say that those lips could be put to good use."

"Good morning babe, and yeah I believe the last time you said that I threatened to bite you cock off."

"I know Fox and I will never ever forgive myself for what I did to you."

"That part of our life's the past babe, but did you really kidnap me because you loved me?"

"Yep no conspiracy Fox, I just wanted you and had to have you, just like I need you now, please Fox don't leave me hard like this, shit I promise we will talk later just not right now."

"It's okay Alex I already told you that I plan to make love to you, please let me babe."

"Shit Fox, I have never done this before."

"What do you mean babe, shit I thought you were gay?"

"My dear Fox I am gay, do you really think I could have made love to you if I was straight, sorry I raped you, anyway I always did the fucking, I seem to be good at just fucking everyone over, one way or another, I always believed I would only let someone I love fuck me."

"Alex just shut up, talking forever won't stop me, I love you, and you love me, so be a good boy and let me do this, I promise to be gentle babe."

"Fine Fox I have no objections, but as for been good, shit I might be tempted to be naughty, especially if I get spanked."

"Mm so my lover has a kinky mind then."

Fuck I just lay there then I felt the cool liquid, then I felt Fox's fingers enter my ass.

"God Fox slow down and make sure you use plenty of lube on your cock, shit you're not exactly small in that department."

"Alex you worry too much, would it be a bad time to let you know I have never fucked anyone before."

"Great so we are both amateurs, just take it very slow Fox, and it will be okay."

God I could feel Fox's fingers going further up my ass, Jesus my cock ached I was so turned on, then his fingers were gone, but I soon found his cock in their place and I was going to explode if Fox went any slower.

"Fuck your really tight babe, I don't know if I can do this without hurting you.”

"Fox just shut the fuck up and go faster."

"You are really bossy Alex maybe one day I might just have to spank you, you want it faster do you babe."

Fuck before I could even reply Fox had shoved his hard cock straight up my ass, he soon found my prostate and made me scream his name. Fox found my cock and jerked me off as I was now desperate and came within minutes. As I tightened my ass I could feel Fox's hot cum shoot into me, he then collapsed on top of me.

"Your gorgeous Alex, especially when your desperate, god that was amazing."

"Yeah tell me about it, it’s just hard to believe that you could really want someone like me."

"Oh I have no intention of letting you go now babe, shit that day in the bullpen I thought that you were really good looking, shit maybe I fancied you back then, when you raped me, I tried so hard to make myself believe I was straight."

"I loved you Fox from day one, I became so obsessed and I had to have you know matter what, shit I could have destroyed you."

"It's over Alex, shit I should have hated you even killed you when I held that gun to you, but no what do I go and do, I knock you out give you a blanket, shit I even kissed you on your cheek."

"We seem to have a lot of problems Fox, maybe we are as fucked as each other."

"Well look at it this way Alex, things can only get better."

I got out of bed and went into the bathroom for a shower, I then dressed and grabbed my jacket.

"Shit Alex where are you going?"

"Don't worry Fox, I plan to come back, I want you to lock the door behind me and stay here, do you understand?"

"What I don't understand is where the hell you think you’re going?"

"Fox I have to see Spender, I need to get him to lay off as we can't stay here forever."

"Maybe I should come with you."

"Shit Fox we just escaped, and if I go alone I can tell him you know everything, see that way he can't risk killing me."

"But what if he does, what if you don't come back, please I am begging you Alex don't go."

"Fox calm down, it will be okay I promise as I have enough information to blackmail Spender, I will be back in a couple of hours, please Fox just keep the door locked."

I gave Fox a long hard kiss then I walked out, I heard the door lock behind me so now all I had to do was pray my plan worked. That I would survive this and come back to the man who wanted me.

I arrived sometime later back at Spenders place, shit it really gave me the shivers coming back here, I got out of my car and went to the black lunged bastards office and knocked.

"Enter."

I had come to despise his voice, I entered the smoke filled room wearing a blank expression.

"Sit down Alex, you have some explaining to do, firstly whereabouts are you hiding that pretty boyfriend of yours?"

"Go to hell Spender like I would tell you that, Fox knows everything along with other people, kill me or him and you’re finished, shit maybe I should shoot you now."

"I see you're still good at opening that pretty mouth of yours Alex, let’s put it this way, I will not touch Fox, I give you my word but by the time I have finished with you Alex you will need a lift home."

"Fuck you."

"You’re so naive Alex, if you don't return soon this will be the first place Fox comes looking for you, and you know he won't sit still for long, so if I really wanted Fox I would just keep you."

"I don't give a shit Spender, I won't tell you."

"Fine I will have every man search every motel within fifty miles, just a location Alex that's all I ask, you don't have to be exact, we just need somewhere we can leave you?"

"Just leave me thirty miles down the road east, I will find my way from there."

"Alex do you not realize that there is only one motel along that road, so I guess we know where to leave you after all."

"You had better not touch him and what do you want with me anyway?"

"Don't worry Fox will be safe, you see Alex, I intend to use you as a message to your precious Fox."

Before I could do anything Spender pressed a button, two very large men entered the room and grabbed me.

"Take him to the torture room as you have two hours, then I want him returned, you can do what you want to him just make sure he survives. Oh and by the way before you return him I want to see him."

Shit I knew fighting them would only make it worse, I was dragged back into that cold cell and stripped then I saw the whip and tried to escape, but I was grabbed and cuffed to the metal rings in the wall. By the time I was secure, I was spread eagled against the cold brick wall. Then I felt the whip hit my bare skin over and over again, shit I tried not to scream and even blacked out from the pain. I felt the cold water against my face, then one of the thugs spoke to me...

"Come on pretty boy wake up, hell we still have over an hour to play with you yet, tell you what let’s see how tight that pretty ass of yours is."

I felt him shove his hard cock deep into my ass, no lube nothing just immense pain, that was when I finally broke the silence and screamed, I spent the next hour been fucked up the ass by the pair of them, finally they un cuffed me and dragged me back to Spender, I was shoved into a chair in front of him, I was still naked.

"Well I see you managed to survive Alex, I want you dressed and out of here. My men will take you to Fox, but remember next time there will be no warning Alex, you and Fox will both be dead. Get him out of here now."

I was dragged to my feet and told to dress, fuck my back was red raw from the whip but I managed to get dressed. I was then shoved into the back of a car, I needed to see Fox, shit thinking about him was all that got me through this. I noticed that we had pulled on to a small side road, then I was dragged from the car then kicked and punched.

I remembered nothing after the beating until we arrived outside the motel, I felt them shove something in my pocket as they dragged from the car. They left me there and drove off, I crawled towards the door and banged as hard as I could. Fox was there in seconds and managed to get me inside and onto the bed, I knew that he was trying not to hurt me any further.

"Shit Alex what have they done to you, I will be gentle but I need to remove your clothes?"

"I will be okay Fox, I just need some rest, the bruises will go and the cuts will heal eventually."

I heard Fox gasp as he removed my tee shirt, I knew by the pain that the whip had made its mark. Soon I felt Fox wash me with warm water and it felt so good, he then removed my jeans and boxers.

"Fuck Alex you’re covered in blood and this might hurt."

  
Shit as Fox washed me, I knew he would realize I’d been raped, fuck my ass was in agony, and I knew he saw the blood, he was so gentle washing me and then he held me in his arms.

"Alex I think you might need some sort of help to get you through this, I will listen if you want to talk babe."

"What can I say Fox, they whipped me and took it in turns raping me, then they beat me that's it?"

"Look babe I’m here for you and always will be but look at yourself, you lay there crying your eyes out yet you act like its nothing, please Alex talk to me."

"Do you really want to know what the hell is bothering me more than anything, because if you fucking do I will tell you?"

"I would like to know, but it’s up to you Alex."

"God I am so sorry Fox for yelling at you, it's just you don't get it do you. I will survive what has happened to me and I’ve suffered worse, but I deserved what I got as I know I’m no better than them. Now I know what I put you through Fox, shit you must have been so scared."

"Alex it's not the same and we can't alter what happened, but deep down I never really believed you would kill me. Shit you were confused and what you did was out of love not hate. I need you to put that behind us, if you had not persisted after your dream we would not be together now. I love you and don't you ever forget that."

"Please hold me close Fox, I just want to know you will still touch me."

"Everything will be okay now babe just relax and sleep for a while."

I drifted into a restless sleep in Fox's arms realizing he still wanted me.  
When I woke up Fox was still beside me and holding me.

"Fox can you check my jacket pocket and see what Spenders goons put there?"

"Okay babe just hang on, it's a note Alex."

"Read it to me Fox please."

"Okay Alex here goes..."

To my dear son  
I believe that one of my employees has a crush on you, well after our last meeting Mr Krycek no longer works for me.  
He is now your responsibility, but be warned if he opens his pretty mouth you both will die.  
If you want to stay alive and keep your boyfriend alive, make sure you never cross me again.  
Don't worry Fox, he only has minor wounds, this was just a warning, next time will be for real.  
You deserve each other, yet it remains beyond my understanding how you can want him near you.  
C.G.B Spender.

"Fucking bastard has the nerve to call me his son, shit he wanted me dead."

"Don't worry about him Fox, it's over now, we can leave here."

"Shit Alex what was you doing going there alone, he could have killed you?"

"It’s okay Fox I told you that I will heal, but at least you can go back home now and you no longer need to hide here."

"What about you Alex?"

"I will survive Fox, I always have."

"Do you even have a home Alex?"

"Any motel or my car, that's my home and where I sleep."

"Do you really think that after all this and all we’ve been through, that I will just leave and go home without you? You’re coming home with me babe, I want my apartment to be your home."

"Shit how can I, you're a G man Fox, you work for the FBI?"

"We will work it out as if it was not for you I would be dead, you will always come first Alex. By the way I’m not asking you to move in with me I am telling you babe, I won’t take no for an answer."

"What about Scully and Skinner, shit if they see me I will be dead, fuck they know I raped you?"

"Why do you think they know babe?"

"That day at the warehouse, shit you were searching for me."

"Alex when I saw you there it was a complete shock, we just got a tip off and you were the last person I expected to see."

"So you mean that you were not there looking for me."

"Alex you just happened to be there, but no one knows about you raping me. I have never told anyone as I even kissed you goodbye, part of me wanted you so please come home with me babe.”

"Only if you really want me Fox, I guess it should be okay and at least I'm not working for that cancerous bastard anymore."

"I want you to get some rest babe, I will pack up, and we can leave in about an hour or so, we can get food on the way home if you want?"

"Yeah I'm starving Fox, but are you really sure you want me, maybe you should go home alone?"

"Alex don't be so stubborn, you’re leaving with me and that's that, I don't want to hear another word on the subject."

I lay there resting as Fox packed, I must have fallen asleep and the next thing I knew was Fox kissing me.

"I've checked us out babe, it’s time to leave if you feel ready."

"God yeah Fox I can't wait to get out of here, I am just a little stiff that’s all."

I managed to get into the car, at least my ass was not as sore as before, we went to a McDonalds drive through and grabbed some food and coffee. I had not realised just how hungry I was, then after reaching Hegal place Fox helped me up to number forty two.

"Sit down Alex and relax while I get us a drink, shit I think we could both use one, and remember babe it’s now your home so please don't be afraid to do what you want."

"It seems really strange you knowing I’m here, normally I have to break in and creep around."

Fox passed me a vodka and sat beside me, I still had to wonder if it was all a dream, as long as I never wake up I will be happy.

"You don’t need to break in now Alex, this is our home we will be living here together as a couple."

"Not so long ago you swore you were straight, god Fox you seem to be coping with all this okay."

"This is nothing compared to some of the x files that I have dealt with, I love you Alex and want you here. Also it’s not that long ago I thought I’d die where I was."

"So you think me and you can really make a go of it then?"

"Yeah babe I really think we can as we have both lived strange lives, I really believe that when you banged your head you had a glimpse of your future, a look at what could be."  
"Hell if what I saw was the future and becomes a reality, I can guarantee that I will be staying around, hey maybe you will spank me and put me in my place."

"So you really are a kinky bastard then Alex?"

"Yep I'm afraid so Fox."

"Good babe it sounds like fun."

Fox grabbed me and gave me a long kiss, I realised that I needed him more than the air I breathe.

"Strip now Fox, god I need to make love to you."

"Come on babe let’s go to the bedroom."

We both stripped out of all our clothes and lay on the bed, fuck I loved this man spread out before me. I played with him for a while just kissing his entire body, my tongue then found the small tight hole between his ass cheeks, I also knew Fox was well gone as my tongue entered him.

I kept this up for a while then replaced my tongue with my aching cock, shit we were both so turned on we came within minutes.

"God Fox I’m really looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you."

"It works two ways babe, and when that ass of yours heals, I plan to fuck you until you scream."

We realised we had a lot in common, TV, films, food, we settled into a routine, but by no way a boring one and we made love often and in a lot of different locations.

We both enjoyed the thrill and yes one day Fox did put me over his knee, he spanked my bare ass and fucked me with his long elegant fingers. I won't say it was always a bed of roses as shit we had arguments, but making up made it all worthwhile.

We finally had a future together and maybe Fox was right and I had seen our future, me Alex Krycek the stubborn bastard that I am wouldn’t let it go, and I have no regrets.  
XXXXXXXXXX

I looked at the life I had, me and Fox had been with each other for a few years now and I still loved him as much now as I did then. Yet I felt pissed off over something, I guess I would need to work out why.

I tried to be happy around Fox but my mood was getting worse, shit I knew the depression was returning the more I thought about things. I realised even after all the years I was still Fox's little secret, if he really loved me why would he not tell anyone about us.

I worked from home on my PC, but I really needed to get out as our home was starting to feel like a prison cell. Fox was on some case so I decided to go find a bar somewhere, maybe I would have a few drinks.

A few hours later I was sat in some dingy little bar and I’d knocked back the vodka like it was water. My head was starting to spin but I just kept drinking, maybe Fox wanted to keep me his dirty secret as I was good to have around to fuck from time to time.

 Shit I knew I shouldn’t be drinking as I knew from past experiences drinking while pissed off never works, I decided maybe enough was enough and it was time to go home. I staggered out of the bar and I could hardly stand on my own two feet, I felt someone's arms go around me and hold me up.

"Hey you seem in a bad way, do you want some company?"

"What sort of company do you expect in return?"

"Well let’s put it this way I can pay you very well."

"Fuck I am no-ones whore, just piss off and leave me alone."

I watched as the man turned and walked away from me, shit is that what I looked like, some fucking cheap whore. Hell maybe Fox giving me a roof over my head believed he was paying for the sex, I really had to stop the feelings I was having shit at this rate I would drive Fox away.

Sometime later I had managed to stagger home and it took me three attempts to unlock the door, shit as I entered, I saw Fox stood there waiting for me.

"Where the fuck have you been Alex?"

"Give me a kiss Fox."

"Fuck you Alex your pissed and stink of smoke and drink, anyway I asked you a question, where have you been?"

"Out."

"That's it Alex, just out, answer me you bastard out where?"

"Fuck off Fox I don't answer to you, anyway I only went for a drink so get over it."

Shit I saw Fox come towards me, then he grabbed me and shoved me hard against the door, he held me tight by my throat.

"You fuckin bastard you could have been dead for all I knew, shit no phone call, no note nothing."

"Fuck you Fox, I already told you you're not my keeper, and I don't fucking answer to you, just piss off and leave me alone."

"Fuck you Krycek, you want to be alone that's fine with me."

I was totally surprised as Fox back handed me across the face, he then went into the bedroom and slammed the door. Shit Fox had never hit me in all the years we had been together, hell maybe I was already losing him.

I decided to spend the night on the couch as there was no way I wanted to go near Fox, at least not until he had calmed down as my face really hurt.  
When morning came I lay there on the couch and opened my eyes, shit I looked up to see Fox standing over me with a mug of coffee.

"Drink this Alex, and you will find some painkillers on the table should you need them."

"Thanks, Fox I am really sorry for last night, I should never have gone without telling you, I was just feeling fed up."

Fox sat on the couch and held me, is hand was stroking my face.

"It’s okay babe and I never meant to hit you, I was just so scared as I thought you might have gone for good, or might even be dead somewhere. I can't be without you babe god I need you so much."

"Shit I never even thought about you or what you might think, but I would never just leave you Fox. I would always come back, please Fox forgive me as I’m so sorry for hurting you."

"Of course I forgive you Alex, I love you, just don't ever scare me like that again, rest now as I really need to leave for work."

After Fox had left I just lay there, god if he was so worried he must love me, I had been such a jerk, I guess that I had some serious making up to do, well no time like the present.

I was good despite the hangover, I cleaned the entire apartment and even did all the washing, I also decided to cook spaghetti for us both and Fox arrived at home just after five.

"Something smells good babe."

"Get changed Fox, food will be served in ten minutes."

"Okay babe I will have a quick shower and change."

When Fox returned I had just put the food on the table.

"Come on Fox, eat it while it’s hot."

"God this is great Alex I can't remember when we last sat and had a proper meal together, and the apartment, hell it must be the cleanest it's looked for a while."

"I am trying to say sorry Fox for last night, I was an idiot, I just get things into my head and won't let them go."

"Why was you so pissed off Alex, if I don't know how can I help you sort it out?"

“I feel at times like your dirty little secret Fox, nobody knows about me and we hardly go out together. At least you work as at times I feel trapped here, also I admit that at times I wonder if you love me or just keep me around for sex."

  
“Why Alex have you never told me this before? I never even realised, god babe I don't care who knows and I love you so much it hurts, that's why I was scared when I thought you might not come back."

"Do you really mean it Fox?"

"Right fine Alex its Friday tomorrow, when I get back from work I want to see you dressed really smart and I promise babe I will take you out. I don't care who sees us together, hell I would not care even if it was Skinner or Scully, as much as I love our sex life I really want you for more than that."

“You really don't have to do it Fox, I will get over how I feel."

"No but I love you and want to treat you, hell your right Alex its time people knew. I’m not ashamed of you babe, god your gorgeous and it makes me feel proud to know you want me."

"But where will we go Fox, how will I know what to wear?"

"Just wear a suit Alex and look smart, as for where we will be going well that’s a surprise, but for now just get your sexy ass in the bedroom, I think it’s time I had my dessert."

"Fuck and you say I'm the bossy one."

"Less talking babe, just move now."

We both went into the bedroom and stripped, fuck Fox was desperate as he pounced on me licking me and biting my nipples.

"God Fox I really need you inside me, shit I am going to come soon."

“Oh don't worry babe, I plan on shoving my hard cock as far up your ass as it will go, I want you to scream for me babe."

"Fuck Fox please just fuck me now."

I felt the cool lube then Fox entered me hard, shit he had not even prepared me, then he hit my prostate.

"God Fox don't stop please, fuck I need you just fuck me, shit I'm coming."

"God I love you babe, shit you’re so hot when your screaming my name."

I felt Fox kissing me, then he screamed my name coming inside my ass, god I was exhausted.

When I opened my eyes I realised I was alone, shit it was eleven and I knew Fox would have gone to work hours ago, but I felt really happy at least I had tonight to look forward to.

I spent the next few hours reading then I checked my suit still fitted, over the years I had been with Fox I’d eaten well. I shouldn’t have worried as the suit still fit me fine, I guess it was all the sex that kept me in shape.

By five I was showered, shaved and dressed in my suit, god I was happy a night with me and Fox out together. By seven Fox had still not returned home, then the phone call came.

"Hi babe it's me."

"Fox where the hell are you, shit I have sat here over two hours waiting for you?"

"We got called out on a case, I'm sorry babe but I won't be home for a few hours."

"Please tell me this is a bad joke Fox?"

"No but I’m really sorry Alex but hey at least it's the weekend, we will go tomorrow night and I promise I will make it up to you babe."

"Fuck you Fox don't bother."

"I know you’re pissed off Alex, but I can't help where I am sent."

"Go to hell."

"Please babe don't do this, not when I can't be there to sort it out."

"I told you Fox fuck off and leave me alone."

I slammed the phone down feeling more pissed off than I had ever felt in my life, I stormed into the bedroom and undressed. I knew it was childish but I grabbed my pen knife and shredded my suit, I then dressed in my jeans tee shirt and leather jacket, I grabbed my keys and stormed out of the apartment slamming the door behind me.

I found myself at the same bar getting pissed on vodka once again,  
I drank far more than last time and then I noticed the good looking young man sit down beside me, shit he had his hand on my thigh.

"Hi sexy, do you fancy a quickie outside."

I was so drunk and still pissed off, hell maybe I was only good for fucking.

"Fine come on let’s go then."

Shit he had to lead me outside, I was really struggling to stand, he leaned me against a wall in some dark alley, then I felt his lips on mine and his hand around my cock, fuck what was I doing, I loved Fox this was all wrong, I shoved him away from me and fastened my jeans.

"Just get away from me, I am sorry, but I don't want you."

"Your loss sexy."

"Yeah whatever."

I staggered towards my car and climbed in and I started the engine, shit I was jerked forward as I crashed into a parked car, the windscreen exploded inwards, I guess it had been a natural reaction to cover my face, my hands where bleeding bad.

I guess it was my own fault as I should never have tried to drive in my state, I decided to abandon the car as someone would find it and trace the plates, at least then I could pay for repairs.

It was a long slow walk home, I shoved my hands inside my jacket to slow down the bleeding, by the time I got home I was exhausted and fell straight asleep on the couch.

Sometime later on I felt my tee shirt lift and felt Fox's hand on my stomach, he was so gentle towards me and my cock turned hard enjoying the attention.

The next thing I knew Fox grabbed me by the hair and shoved me hard on the floor, he then sat over me, but I realised by the look of hate in his eyes sex was the last thing on his mind.

"Get the fuck off me Fox, what the hell are you doing?"

"More to the point what have you been doing Alex?"

"What the fuck are you talking about, you stood me up so I got pissed, I don't understand what the hell your problem is Fox?"

"Who did you fucking kill or beat up while you were getting pissed Alex?"

"I have hurt no one Fox, so just leave me the fuck alone."

I felt the hard slap against my cheek, shit my eyes were watering and my head hurt.

"So who does the blood belong to then, I checked Alex you have no cuts on your stomach."

"Oh my god, I have blood on my shirt and straight away you think I must have killed someone, well thanks for nothing Fox."

"Just tell me then Alex."

"Fuck you Fox, what's a relationship without trust."

Fuck this time he hit me even harder, I felt my bottom lip split open, had it come to this did Fox really hate me?

"Last chance, fucking tell me now Alex, or else."

"Or else what Fox, you're a fucking arsehole so just leave me alone."

Shit then he started banging my head against the floor, I could hear him yelling as I passed out.

"I fucking hate you Alex, I hate you, I hate you."

XXXXXXXXXX

I realised it was all a set up, fuck here I was face to face with Fox, He was chasing me into an old warehouse, then he had me cornered, then Fox shoved me hard against the wall.  
I woke up screaming, shit I was unable to stop, then I saw Fox, he tried holding me but I pushed him away.

"Alex calm down babe its okay."

"What the fuck am I doing here?"

"Your at home babe, it's me Fox I am here with you."

"Don't you come near me Mulder, or try fucking touching me again."

"Alex please tell me what's wrong babe?"

"It’s not real none of it, it's all just a dream."

"I’m here Alex, and I love you."

"You hate me Fox, shit you chased me and knocked me out."

"I am a little lost here Alex, can you explain it to me."

"I was in a warehouse, you cornered me Fox, and you hated me."

"I’m real babe and I'm going nowhere, do you know what I really believe Alex, I explained to you that when you banged your head before you had a glimpse at the future and a life you could have.

fought as hard as you could and hung on to what you believed was right, I think what's happened Alex is that you just had a glimpse of the past a reminder of the time we hated each other."

"So you mean it's like a warning of what was and what could be again if we keep arguing, shit Fox, I don't want to lose you."

"It’s okay Alex, fuck I was the idiot and blamed you of horrible things and treat you like shit, the police reported your car and wanted to know if the driver was okay, it was your own blood, yet I would not believe you, god I am so sorry."

"I know your sorry Fox, but I don't want to be a dirty secret anymore."

I felt Fox's lips on mine, and I saw the tears, fuck what was we doing apart from destroying what we had.

"When I banged your head on the floor, I swear I really thought that I had killed you, and it was not who I am or where I work that scared me, it was the thought of a lifetime alone without you."

"I need you too Fox, we have to deal with this, just promise we can do things as a couple please."

"It’s okay Alex, I don't think you're my dirty little secret anymore..."

"Why Fox?"

"Look over in the chair babe, it’s okay don't worry she came to help and knows everything."

I turned my head towards the chair and saw Scully sat there.  
"It’s okay Mulder called me to help after he hurt you and yes me and Skinner know everything, I also know without you Spender would have killed him."

"And you accept me and all Fox has told you Scully?"

"Yes Alex, Fox has told me a lot and I think you seem to have done well since you left Spender, I must go but when your better we can all go out, by the way you both make a good couple, you’re as stubborn as each other and in future don't keep blaming yourself just talk to each other."

"Well Alex it looks like you have had your own X file babe."

"Yeah Fox but at least this one has a happy ending."

"While you were out of it I phoned work, I have taken one month’s leave babe and, I plan to spend every day with you. Hell we can have a good time, during that month I plan to invite a Few friends over and have a party"

"It sounds great a whole month just us, by the way what's the party for, what are we celebrating?"

"Well babe I want to go to Vegas and get married, that's if you will have me?"

"Shit Fox your proposing to me?"

  
"That's generally what marriage means Alex, but you are supposed to accept or decline and make me cry, hell I think I would cry either way."

"God of course the answers yes Fox, I can't wait it will be very real then."

We spent the month together, we even got married, it was great and all of Fox's friends seemed to like me, Fox has gone back to work and life returned to normal, but it’s perfect and I never want to change what I have, or have another X file.

The End of Alex's X File  
By CarolelaineD  


 


End file.
